Date Life: If it's ancient history, move on!

Posted by Midwest2U Staffer on

Whether we're talking about sex or just hooking up, the last thing your boyfriend wants to consider is that another guy has been with you. He can go absolutely crazy imagining some other guy getting down with you.

Have you had a complicated sexual past with a lot of experience? If so, your boyfriend might find it difficult to handle this. But he must come to terms with this. Never allow anyone to hold your past against you or to throw it in your face. Let it stay in the past if it's recent history (or only a few months ago), and go on.

He needs to accept you for who you truly are. He must accept you for who you are if he wants to be with you.

And everything is meant by that. Of course, this does not imply that he must approve of your sexual history, but it does mean he cannot hold it against you. He should not have expressed interest in you and then begun to dig up dirt on your past at the same time. If he keeps bringing up your past, tell him outright that if he wants to date you, he will have to accept everything about you.

If it's ancient history, move on!

Inform him that he has two options:

  1. a) You two part ways.
  2. b) You two remain together, but he is forbidden from bringing up your past relationships ever. Not even when the two of you are at odds.

Move past your mistakes and learn from them. The fleeting pleasures of sex and hooking up can damage your reputation and self-worth in the long run. What matters most is that you are acting morally if you have decided to alter your "free loving" ways. 

On the other hand, you might want to reconsider whether you really need to date such a puritanical person if you've only had a few hookups and your man is making a big deal about it.

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